Kale's blog

Will-o'-the-wisp, where's that wrinkle in time?

Month: June, 2012

Butterfly Wings

cloud formation

See that? I understand it doesn’t look like a butterfly. Neither did I think of a butterfly when I say that cloud formation while I was moving to my brother’s house.

However, Owl City‘s Butterfly Wings was playing while I was looking up and seeing that.

I believe I was seeing a seagull. Like those in the photos in the book Jonathan Livingston Seagull by Richard Bach. But I’ll leave it to you to make of it what you will.


My handy phone dictionary defines the term as a “friendship between different people or groups, and a sense of having something in common“.

Personally, I can’t be satisfied with that sort of definition. It doesn’t give you the real picture of what it means to be a community. It doesn’t give you a real idea of a community.

Truthfully, not many of us actually understand what a real community is. Even a lesser number of us experience being in one.

I live in the province. In a town that has not yet been overcome by urbanization. In our corner of town, there’s even less influence of that. Some of us, many of us still live in houses without a touch of concrete.

People from other places would call us poor. Well, it’s quite true. Financially.

Technologically, we have been left a bit behind. Sure, we do get mobile phone service. You reach like 10, 12 years old and you just gotta have a cellphone. Even younger, for some.

However, the phone line companies have not yet bothered to make their lines reach as far as our place. Hence, where I live, there’s no internet connection.

But they say that there are many ways in which we can measure wealth. And I believe them. Because, if there is one wealth that we can be proud of, it is our sense of community.

It’s not that big a place but the person living on one edge of our place would most probably know the person living on the other side. In one zone, as we call the smaller divisions of our place, it’s also very much possible that it’s actually just one family, one huge extended family, living there. With one family name. Albeit, with the occasional ones who differ.

I went to a subdivision on a weekend once, to a classmate’s house, and it was as if people didn’t even know each other. It didn’t help that it was so quiet and it was like everyone was cooped up in their houses with no intention at all to interact with the people around them.

We have real neighbours here. Neighbours we share stuff with. Neighbours we do things with. Neighbours we can go to for help when we need it.

Speaking of sharing, we have this vacant patch of land close to the beach. I have a cousin who decided that it’s wasteful leaving it that way so she planted root crops. Yesterday, she gave us some of the produce. I thought she was seriously trying to sell it but she really just wanted to give us some of the produce of our land.

We had it for breakfast this morning. Our neighbours bought some of it from my cousin. My mother has never been the type to cook food far beyond edibility but one of our neighbours willingly shared the toppings they made. They’d have shared the entire dish if we didn’t have the base. I didn’t even have to ask for it. It was good breakfast.

See, there’s beauty in that. In the city, you have to be invited over for dinner to share other people’s food. And, you’ll be expected to bring some food over and be dressed for dinner. In our place, you just gotta eat outside your house and you wouldn’t even need to share a table in order to share breakfast. Or any dinner, for that matter.

This, among others, is exactly why I can never truly wish to get out of here. I keep saying that, once I have enough money, I’d get out of here and move to the big city. Everything there is bigger – the houses, the roads, the opportunities, everything.

But the country has this… This something that I can’t put a name on. That something makes me want to stay here and wish that things don’t change.

It’s not just the community. It’s more than the community. It’s bigger than the community.

Unfortunately, they also say that change is the only thing permanent in this world. And I believe them on that one, too. Still, one can always wish.

Think Good Thoughts

I most certainly have no idea whatsoever as to why I feel this way at this very moment but I cannot complain. I am loving this feeling and I absolutely do not want it to be ruined by any trivialities of the daily grind of life.

I feel so light. Like, floating in the clouds. And, no, I didn’t resort to drugs just to be able to feel something like this.

I’m happy. I think, that’s the right word for it. Happy but have not one bit of a clue as to what is making me feel like this.

It’s brilliant.

It’s like, there should be a celebration going on right now. Exuberance. Jubilation. Whatever. Although, now that I say them, those words sound quite big. Just up there in the clouds would be enough.

Now, of course, the world doesn’t always want to agree with you. For instance, right now, the heat is slowly getting to me. When the temperature reaches this level, it usually makes me go down a few steps in my mood.

Nevertheless, I don’t want such minor details getting to me.

Which is why, I say to myself, think good thoughts.

No matter how good you feel in a moment, so long as your mind is not in tune with it, there is no way that you can keep that really good feeling with you.

On the other hand, if you are feeling so low, like the entire world is about to come crushing down on you, simply go back to those moments when you were happy. Think them. Swim through them. Drown yourself in the days when the soul of the world was in agreement with you.

Eventually, that negativity will seep out of you and you will remember that there remains beauty in this world that we live in. All it takes is for you to keep them in focus and leave the rest behind knowing that they pale in comparison to the majestic bounty of life.

Think good thoughts.

I may never truly find out what gave me this sort of wonderful feeling but not knowing is half the beauty of it.

I’ll watch the stars tonight.