On the Matter of Going to Church
This morning, someone wished me a blessed Sunday and told me to “go to church so that my sins may decrease”. But I can never heed that advice for I have stopped believing in the church I was baptized into before I could even the see the world around me.
I know I’m not alone. Far too many of us were baptized before we could even speak our first word that our mothers would later put in our book. We were baptized not in the way of the Bible but in the way of the Church. For a ceremony so sacred, it is ironic that it is not performed in the manner that the Book describes it to be.
Some time ago, I was shocked when I first heard of such things as the “Certificate of Debaptism“. I could never understand why people would want to have such things. I wasn’t born to a religious house but I was born to one with a religion. I thought it was blasphemous and devoid of conscientiousness.
But now I understand. We were baptized before we even had the chance to decide thereby taking away our right to freedom of religion. We were baptized without our heartfelt acceptance of God thereby taking away the essence of the ceremony. We were baptized before we could even say “No” thereby taking away our free will.
Last night, my mother asked me to wake sleep early so that I may wake up early today so that she could go to church. She didn’t go so I asked her why and she answered me, “Maybe the Devil held me and whispered to me, ‘Don’t go.'” She said she was to make up for it by praying the rosary. If she won’t be able to, the Devil was still holding on to her.
I wanted to think that it wasn’t the Devil who was holding on to her but an angel who wanted to keep her out of the Church. If she wasn’t able to pray the rosary, it would’ve been an angel still holding on to her keeping her from praying in front of statues and carvings.
These statues and carvings are but one reason why I no longer believe in the Church. Ironically enough, it was the Book which made me stop believing. It is ironic for the Book is supposed to be the basis of the existence of the Church. But it is in the Book where I learned that things are not to be the way that the Church have made them become.
Now, if I did go to church, would that have decreased my sins? Perhaps. Perhaps it would have decreased my sins to the Church. But it ends there. It wouldn’t have decreased my sins to the One who matters. It wouldn’t have in any way whatsoever.
It is not the Church that I want to follow.